We the people of Wesleyan University have long been able to turn to the Argus as a beacon of truth and light when circumstance itself does not make it abundantly clear what is Good and what is ill in our world. Thus, it was with heavy heart that I found last Tuesdays edition to contain the yellowest piece of yellow journalism I have ever come across. Grillegate centerpiece Jonathan Brain is guilty of no crime, and did not "Admit to Ballot Fraud" as the front-page headline of Tuesdays Argus reported. I find it shocking and reprehensible that objectivity, the cornerstone of journalistic integrity, was scrapped in the name of sensationalism and libel in this highly misleading portrayal of my client.

Mr. Brain is no villain, and has neither admitted to nor been charged with wrongdoing of any kind. He is a pillar of our community, and his enthusiasm and devotion to both Aramark and the Wesleyan Student Body should be commended, not vilified.

To set the record straight: My client did not photocopy a completed ballot and dump it in the voting box, as implied by Mr. Williamson, but rather made copies of a blank ballot, and painstakingly filled each one out by hand. Not only did my client wish to save his friends at Aramark to cost of producing additional ballots, but he also felt it important not to deprive his competitors fair access to the ballots.

The victory that Mr. Brain has earned here is not at the expense of Aramark or the student body, but rather stands as an example of the best of what a Wesleyan activist is. Should we condemn him for mobilizing the full extent of his resources in the pursuit of a goal he believed in passionately? Should we punish him for his creativity and innovation? Of course not. These are the same values we so admire when employed by USLAC and the founders of the Cunt Club. At Wesleyan, we fight for what we believe in, be it a living wage, our vaginas, or the chicken chimichanga. My client is not a crook; he is a Hero.