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I don’t know anything about it.

Are you sure?

Yes.

You’ve also been know as "that kid in the doctor’s coat." Why?

Ammm... ammm... I don’t know... [starts laughing hysterically]

If you had a whole day with nothing to do, how would you spend it?

I’d arrange the New York Times by font size. 

So... What do you do here at Wesleyan? Why are you here?

What kind of question is that?

Seems pretty normal to me...

No comment. [starts laughing again]

This is a pretty tough interview, dude... you’re not opening up to me... 

This is not happening...

Oooook... Are you all right? Are you on drugs or something?

I don’t like this interview.

Rutherford, you don’t make any sense. Say something! Why are just staring at me and laughing like that?

Don’t touch me.

But I’m not touching you! I’m not anywhere near you! Damn you!

I have to go see how my computer is doing.

Right now? We were just getting to know each other... That’s really sad. Do you do whatever your computer tells you to?

Of course, doesn’t everyone? Wait, don’t put words in my mouth. Wait, that’s fine...ok.

Are you a psycho?

No. I live right next door.

Would you show me your belly button ring?

My computer is getting lonely.

But, I’m lonely too.

I said don’t touch me!!!

What the f---?! I’m not anywhere near you! Where the hell do you get off? Ok, ok... let’s make this an easy question... Are you single?

What? I don’t like that question...Wait, does this have to be part of the interview? C’mon.

You’re not being very considerate of my feelings. Does it always have to be about your computer?

That’s what it tells me.

Ok, ok... where are you from? That’s easy, right? Damn it, stop laughing at me like that.

Palo Alto.

Figuratively, you idiot!

Your putting words in my mouth again.

I want you to portray a positive side of yourself for me, Rutherford.

In that case you should consult the current replacement Rutherford, whose name is Meeth Soni.

Who’s that?

Let me know if you would like to be the next replacement Rutherford.

Dude, like, what the hell are you talking about?

I prefer freshmen...

This has been the most random, incomprehensible interview I have ever done. This is the end of this now. Any last words?

Orange is the new fad.