Hermes Index

(With apologies to Harpers Magazine)


1. Average erect penis length of an elephant, in feet: 5-6

2. Average erect penis length of a humpback whale, in feet: 10

3 Average erect penis length of a man, in inches: 6

4. Average erect penis length of a pig, in inches: 18-20

5. Proportion of male survey participants self-identified as "very homophobic" whose penis circumference increased while watching gay male pornographic films: 4/5

6. Percentage of Minnesota middle and high school heterosexual female teenagers who have attempted suicide: 14.5

7. Percentage of lesbians and bisexual female teens who have attempted suicide: 20.5

8. Percentage of heterosexual male teens: 4.2

9. Percentage of gay or bisexual male teens: 28.1

10. Percentage of Americans who thought homosexuality should not "be considered an acceptable lifestyle" in 1983: 58

11. Percentage of Americans who thought homosexuality should not "be considered an acceptable lifestyle" in 1992: 57

12. Percentage of Americans who thought that sexual relations between two adults of the same sex were "always" wrong in 1974: 70

13. Percentage of Americans who thought so in 1994: 62

14. Perentage of Federal prisoners held for drug offenses in 1982: 25

15. Percentage in 1997: 60

16. Legal minimum fuel-effieiency rating for a car, in miles per gallon: 27.5

17. For a light truck: 20.7

18. For a large-model light truck (minivan, pickup): None

19. Expected increase in American consumption of gasoline use by 2010: 33%

20. Proportion of Sports Utility Vehicles bought by people from households of 3 or fewer people: 3/4

21. Percentage of the world's indigestion remedies bought by US residents: 40

Sources: 1-4: Leight Rutledge, The Gay Book of Lists (Boston: Alyson Publications, 1987); 5: Professor Henry Adams, University of Georgia at Athens; 6-9: The Advocate, October 14, 1997; 10,11: Gallup Organization; 12,13: National Opinion Research Center; 14,15: Rolling Stone, December 11, 1997; 16-20: The New York Times, November 30, 1997; 21: Newsweek, November 24, 1997.